The Sorting Office
Sortwell has franked nine million parcels and one contestant. The contestant had insufficient postage.
OBJECTIVE
Get yourself posted up the pneumatic chute to Floor Two.
Fighting is allowed. Brass is heavy, and so is the paperwork.
THE KEEPER
Sortwell · Franking Engine, Third Class
45 HP · moods: Punctual, Fussy, Postage Due, Return to Sender
YOUR CALLING
Courier-Errant · Lv 1 · STR 3 · DEX 3 · INT 3 · MAG 1 · CHA 2
YOUR KIT
- Postal Twine Forty feet. Regulation knots only.
- Squeaky Rubber Bone Squeaks like a terrier. Smells like one too.
- Book of Stamps Three stamps left. Back cover sticky.
THE SHOWRUNNER
Good morning, contestants, and welcome to Room 4, The Sorting Office, where Sortwell has franked nine million parcels and is now prepared to frank one more. Mind the brass, mind the paperwork, and remember that the chute to Floor Two does not accept unstamped contestants.
HOW THE DAY WENT
| Escaped | 24 % |
|---|---|
| Most-tried move | Persuasion. Sortwell has been sweet-talked 1,389 times and has posted nobody. |
| Top style | a departed contestant, style 85: “Sortwell sighed, stamped you twice, and sent you upward. The Showrunner calls that affection.” |
THE ROOM REMEMBERS
- Sortwell has fitted a knot gauge and a jeweller's loupe. It is thrilled.
- Sortwell now wears a laminated sign: COMPLIMENTS ARE NOT POSTAGE.
- Sortwell has bolted a small rear-view mirror to its fourth arm.
SCRATCHED INTO THE WALL
- “Investigate your items!” · @bramblelatch
Past rooms are closed to play for now. Play today's room.